BQBL: Week 8 Scores

Alright, let's move on from last week, where Rob clearly hacked the game and installed a "bad qb shotbot". He was severely reprimanded and is remorseful for his crimes, and we've sent a strong memo to the rest of the league concerning the matter.

• Nan: 82
• Panthers - Cam Newton: 5
• Jaguars - Blaine Gabbert: 62
• Chiefs - Matt Cassel: 15
• Buccaneers - Josh Freeman: bye

In a recession week for everyone, Blaine Gabbert just keeps going strong for Nan.

• Alison: 28
• Cowboys - Tony Romo: 5
• Eagles - Michael Vick: 12
• Browns - Colt McCoy: 16
• Lions - Matthew Stafford: -5

Looking at these numbers, you probably wouldn't even be able to figure out that the Tony Romo and Michael Vick played against each other in what turned out to be a blowout loss for Dallas. Those five BQBL points Tony put up were for an interception that wasn't even his fault, either. Damn that Martellus Bennet! I knew he should have been waived instead of Tashard Choice! Sorry again for real football complaints. Moving on.

• Me: 66
• Redskins - John Beck: 32
• Bills - Ryan Fitzpatrick: 10
• 49ers - Alex Smith: 8
• Bengals - Andy Dalton: 15

Writhing in my grave with the knowledge that the Bills signed Ryan Fitzpatrick to a fat contract extension, and that some analysts at ESPN have started calling him Fitz-Magic. I suppose I should consider myself fortunate that the Grantland staff never foresaw something of this magnitude on the BQBL radar and failed to pre-assign negative points for "lining your pockets". What's worse is, somehow all of my teams won this week, except for the Redskins, and that's only because they played the Bills!

• Rob: 99
• Dolphins - Matt Moore: 27
• Raiders - Carson Palmer: bye
• Broncos - Tim Tebow: 50
• Colts - Curtis Painter: 22

Oakland's BQBs are taking the week off to rest their interception-throwing arms, and meanwhile, Tebow-mania begins in the ranks of the BQBL. AHA, that's what he must've been doing last week: Tebowing! Cheater.

• Xian: 68
• Texans - Matt Schaub: 5
• Steelers - Ben Roethisberger: -2
• Ravens - Joe Flacco: 4
• Seahawks - Charlie Whitehurst: 35.5, Tavaris Jackson: 25.5

Xian's first benching of the season, but you'd hardly be able to figure out who was benched for who in that Seattle game against the 49ers! Meanwhile, the rest of his QBs played solid games against weak opponents (the Patriots have a leaky pass defense; even if the rest of their team is still functional, you can't say that the QBs that face them are going to have anything resembling a hard time)

• GOOD QB NPC: 78
• Patriots - Tom Brady: 18
• Chargers - Philip Rivers: 30
• Saints - Drew Brees: 30
• Packers - Aaron Rodgers: bye
• MEDIUM QB NPC: 14
• Giants - Eli Manning: -4
• Falcons - Matt Ryan: bye
• Cardinals - Kevin Kolb: 18
• Jets - Mark Sanchez: bye
• BAD QB NPC: 38
• Titans - Matt Hasselbeck: 0
• Bears - Jay Cutler: bye
• Vikings - Christian Ponder: 12
• Rams - AJ Feeley: 26

Man, just when you think your groupings are correct, all the best QBs suddenly put up stinkers. They all lost, too, by the way. Except Aaron Rodgers, who pulled a Final Destination by having a bye week.