A good day of football today, Dallas vs. Miami. Down in Florida, it was apparently burning under the oppression of the sun, and both teams sagged while they were on the field. I don't know about the Dolphins, but I know the Cowboys own a "personal air-conditioning system" for those extensively nasty games in that Dallas half-dome, where it gets both very hot, and very cold. The system plugs into the back of a player's shoulderpads, and pumps either hot or cold air straight into their confining uniform and circulates around to keep them from over-heating.
At first, the game was normal, though the offense was on the field for an abnormally long time, wearing out Miami's defense and scoring a couple of times. Though Miami came back by the end of the first half, it was pretty clear that their defense was tired, over-heated, and rather upset at being out on the field for two-thirds of the first thirty minutes.
As the second half wore on, the Dolphins actually became laughingly obsolete, and it seemed to become a contest between the Cowboy's offense, and the Cowboy's defense - who wanted to sit on the sidelines in their air-conditioned pads more. As soon as the defense stepped on the field, they made a spectacular interception of the football, and Nan and I adlibbed them as they celebrated: "Get back out there, Tony Romo! That's right! Back to my air-conditioning! Boy, howdy is it hot out he-yuh!"
Offense walks onto the field? Immediate huge play for touchdown. "That's right, defense. We're done here, why dun ya'll get back onto the field! I'm hustling back for my air-conditioning and Gatorade."
They went back and forth maybe five times in the final quarter, in a small war over who would get to sit on the sidelines longer before Miami simply gave up in disgust.
