Las Vegas March 2013, Day 4

There's a ten dollar store in the Rio, and we bought another bag late night after dinner and packed it in the morning to get all our new sweatshirts and coats home.  We checked out pretty late and headed over to Caesar's to try the new buffet, Bacchanal.  And I finally realized that the entire weekend, we had been very lucky with lines.  Everything (that's not a casino, I suppose) involves lines, and we just happened to be missing the lines everywhere we went.  We had given up on valet-ing our car at the casinos, so no more lines there.  We went to buffets at extremely off hours, so had not yet encountered a line.  And all the attractions we tried to go to had been wait-free.
Not true at Bacchanal.  I thought there wouldn't be a ridiculous line because it was a Monday.  I was wrong.  I am grimly convinced now that there is always a ridiculous line.  At all hours of the day, every day of the week.  I know there was a ridiculous line when we got there, there was still a ridiculous line when we got in, and there was a ridiculous line when we left!  At 3pm! I thought we could come back at a non-lunch hour and it would be better, and that was not true.  We walked all the way around the forum shops, and outside Caesar's, but no.  Still a line.  So we just grit our teeth to get inside - it's a new buffet, and the decor is pretty interesting (chandeliers made of drinking glasses), so we wanted to check it out.  The line of food is immense.  Each international section could stand alone as it's own buffet - Chinese, Mexican, Italian, American.  Because each section is so long, some uncommon offerings are among the regular fare.  Fried donut sticks and peking duck, sliders and oyster shooters.  The dining areas were split into an area where all the decor was glass, another area where it was all wood, and another where it was all ebony.  The best part was at the end of the line, where some industrious dudes were juicing things and placing cups of squeezed juice on ice, and one industrious dude who was shucking oysters as fast as he could to appease the crowd.  And there was a crowd - the down side of the super-sized Bacchanal is that no amount of food and servers can really keep up with that many people. Desserts were plentiful and creative, if not the most delectable I've ever had.  The forum shops had a very nice atrium, actually, but the stores, like at Crystals, are so top-of-the-line that one need not bother going inside any of them.  Well the H&M is probably reasonable, but check out the entrance:

We don't have a shot of it from far away, but that's a three story entrance.  Also, I have a picture of the main entrance atrium.  (Somebody loves him some curved escalators)

We left for the CityCenter to check out the Mandarin Oriental.  I hadn't heard anything about it before, so I was surprised by the fact that the lobby is on the 23rd floor - almost nothing on the ground floor entrance except a bank of elevators that takes you to the real lobby.  I was a bit thrown for a loop.  But the lobby does have a really great view, so I suppose it's worth the moment of confusion.  Between Aria and Mandarin Oriental there is a strip of galleries, and usually we don't care about that sort of thing, but we did peek into the Dale Chihuly gallery.  After that, we watched the water wall for a bit and then headed to the airport.

Dead Space 3, Day 1

Can you believe it?  I forced Xian to set up a skype recorder, so we could make an awesome video of first reactions to what I was assuming would be an epic opening set piece, and.... nothing!  I feel so ripped off.  If I had only recorded our first playthrough of Dead Space 2, it would have been amazing.  Alas for missed chances for us, back then, and for Dead Space 3, now.
I had heard that there was some light outrage, something about the game giving up on being scary, complaints about multiplayer, something.  I wasn't concerned, because I never felt it was the solitude that was scary.  After all, Xian never actually played the game alone.  I felt that the atmosphere could still be there, with two people.  But no, it's not about the multiplayer.  The game isn't scary because it has, in fact, abandoned any pretense at atmosphere or scary.  It has become full modern RE, or even worse, Borderlands.  The opening sequence is so not scary, there's no words for it.  You just roll up to a brightly lit spaceship armed with full guns, ammo, and health, as some nameless person that's probably going to die anyway.  You go ahead and click that link back at the top.  Look how dark it is in DS2, first of all.  You can't see anything properly, except for the gruesome death of the only person that is helping you, right off the bat.  You're a crazy man, one hit from death, in a straitjacket.  That's right.  You don't even get use of your arms at the opening of Dead Space 2.  You don't get kinesis or the plasma cutter until after... well, some gruesome stuff happens first, I'm not going to lie (like I did during those parts to reassure Xian).  But it was more memorable than Dead Space 3, right?  Man, in the middle of that video, it is so dark, you can not see a thing while reloading your gun, since the gun has the flashlight on it. So you unload the clip into one creature, and then all is dark for the entire seconds of reload - you just have to hope that the other one didn't close in on you in the pitch darkness.
And where are my super-creepy Nicole hallucinations?  And super-punishing deaths?  Sometimes, the deaths in DS2 were so bad that Xian would shut off the machine and we'd all have ice cream instead.  In Dead Space 3, we were at Chapter 5 before we knew it.  By Chapter 5 in Dead Space 2, we had already seen a man slit his own throat, crashed a tram and had to fight off brutes upside-down, been through the creepy ruins of a city, been through an even creepier church of Unitology, been swarmed by a pack of scary zombie children and then shot them out an airlock, and finally betrayed by the only lady helping you and made a harrowing escape.  Just to fight a boss.  These are the kind of cinematic setpieces I'm expecting from you, Dead Space.  I don't want to play another Gears of War.  Or what this is really turning into: Borderlands.  Because of their new crafting system, I find myself wishing more necros would show up so I can get my hands on more materials to craft more awesome trinkets.  That's bad, Visceral - wanting more necros should be counter to your goals.  Or is it?  I hear that you want to 'appeal to a broader audience' to sell more stuff (or someone has told you to do so), is this the way you're doing it?  It really feels like you've taking away the 'Dead Space-ness' of it all.
Well, we will turn it up to a harder difficulty and see how the rest of the game goes.

LCS EU Qualifiers, Day 3

Here's the link at TwitchTV to watch them, though I'm not sure what order they're supposed to be in - I think this is the last day, so these may post in backwards order.  But, they have a live audience!  So that kind of gives it a more entertaining edge.

Mousesports vs DragonBorns, Game 1 (00:50:00)
---mouz bans: Xin Zhao, Kayle, Olaf---DB bans: Varus, Dr. Mundo, Evelynn---
mouz: Shen, Amumu, Jayce, Caitlynn, Zyra
DB: Jax, Cho'gath, Kha'Zix, Ezreal, Sona
After so long watching the same handful of champs in NA qualifiers, EU is a breath of fresh air.  Sure, Ez/Sona lane bot and Shen top is the very same as NA, and Jayce/Kha'Zix/Amumu are staples, but look at those bans!  Varus, Dr. Mundo?  Are you trolling?  Worth mentioning: gentleman Cho'gath!  Is everyone in the EU this aggressive?  There doesn't seem to be such a thing as 'disengage' for either team here.  Also, DragonBorns, why do you have to go this long route to qualify?  You're just going to smash all your opponents, aren't you?

Even the music they play between games is different in the EU.

Mousesports vs DragonBorns, Game 2 (1:43:00)

---mouz bans: Xin Zhao, Kayle, Evelynn---DB bans: Varus, Dr. Mundo, Elise---

DB: Olaf, Cho’gath, Kha’Zix, Ezreal, Janna

mouz: Vlad, Lee Sin, Syndra, Vayne, Alistar

mouz obviously knows that they need to keep DB down early, but early ganks and lane switches turn out disastrously.  Disastrous isn’t even a strong enough word for what happened.  Catastrophic may not cover it, either.  You should probably watch it: start at around 1:45:00.  DB gets so far ahead that they could probably have ended it by fifteen minutes, but instead, they start playing very recklessly, and several lengthy, sloppy fights ensue.  “Playing with their food,” I believe Deman said.  It got ugly.

MeetYourMakers vs Millenium Game 1 (2:40:00)

---MYM bans: Fizz, Kha’Zix, Kayle---M bans: Twisted Fate, Jayce, Wukong---

MYM: Olaf, Xin Zhao, Karthus, Miss Fortune, Zyra

M: Shen, Lee Sin, Ryze, Urgot, Taric

This game was a slow, low-death-count game.  It’s not like the mouz vs. DB game, where wonton aggression steadily gets everyone killed off – both M and MYM play it pretty defensive.  Even in a 5v5 fight, only 1 or two people will die.  It was close for a long time, but eventually edged out by MYM’s MF, hanging out in the unreachable ethers.

MeetYourMakers vs Millenium Game 2 (3:40:00)

---M bans: Twisted Fate, Zyra, Olaf---MYM bans: Fizz, Kha’Zix, Wukong---

M: Xin Zhao, Lee Sin, Nidalee, Caitlyn, Nunu

MYM: Shen, Kayle, Jayce, Miss Fortune, Sona

Why ban Zyra?  It was the MF that ruined you last game.  And now she has a Kayle. 

MeetYourMakers vs DragonBorns Game 1 (5:02:00)
---MYM bans: Kha'Zix, Nidalee, Evelynn---DB bans: Twisted Fate, Jayce, Shen---
MYM: Olaf, Amumu, Wukong, Vayne, Sona
DB: Xin Zhao, Kayle, Vi, Ezreal, Taric
Gotta love Shushei, with his unknown champ picks.  Also, about a minute into the game it's four to one deaths in favor of DB.

MeetYourMakers vs DragonBorns, Game 2 (5:48:00)
---DB bans: Twisted Fate, Shen, Jayce---MYM bans: Kha'Zix, Nidalee, Vi---
DB: Evelynn, Xin Zhao, Lux, Ezreal, Soraka
MYM: Olaf, Kayle, Wukong, Miss Fortune, Sona
For those of you out there like me, hoping to see some epic Lux play from Shushei, let me pop your bubble before you watch it: no such luck.  But DB is still an unstoppable force.  Now that I realize that this is the final day, I wonder how DB fell to the third day instead of qualifying on one of the first days.

Las Vegas March 2013, Day 3

We were getting up at 8am anyway, so arriving after 9am to the site of the time share complex was no problem for us.  This particular one so happened to be within the network of Nan's mom's timeshare company, so we've heard of it - there aren't that many in Vegas, after all.  So we put on our endurance+3 gear and patiently waded through the filling out of paperwork and waiting, etc.  Luckily, the sales company knew what was up.  Each couple/family got their own salesperson, and the pitch was literally made over a generous breakfast.  It really helped my attention span to be able to nibble on some breakfast pastries and sip juice.  And it wasn't a hard sell - once we politely declined, they handed us our Blue Man Group tickets and wished us a pleasant vacation.  That was a relief, because the lady who made us attend was extremely pushy. You never know sometimes, with these kinds of things.
At any rate, since we were on the south end of the strip, I steered us in the direction of the Silverton Casino to check out the reports of a gigantic fish tank.  It was there, but it was still early for feeding time, so we wandered into the humongous Bass Pro Shop.  How big, you ask?  There were multiple waterfalls, multiple swimming-pool-sized fish tanks, and a huge floor area to display entire boats.

Fish feeding was interesting, because all of gigantic rays in the tank were handfed by the diver right up against the glass.  We didn't stay long, though, because the aforementioned bad parents vacationing in Las Vegas were taking a vacation from controlling their children, and we were largely getting run over by very loud kids.  We headed to the Monte Carlo to catch the 4pm Blue Man show.  There were lots of kids at the early show on Easter, which made me nervous, but they weren't too much in the way. The show was awesome as advertised, here's the last song, which may spoil it for you if you are sensitive to spoils?  The rear level of seats was 90% as good as the front orchestra, so if it comes down to that decision, don't spend a lot more to sit up front.  Though the very front row gets ponchos to wear :)

Our tickets came with a 2-for-1 deal at the nearby cupcake shop, so obviously we had to do that.  After a light nap, we went to the Village Buffet the the Rio, which is supposedly the best (and only) seafood buffet on the strip.  It did have unlimited lobster tails as advertised, though lobster tails in bulk somewhat turn out like crawdads.  Still, lobsters and oysters, I'm not complaining.  Though, service was pretty spotty, I'll complain about that - they were kind of closing up underneath us.

LCS Qualifiers: Day 3, Eliminations

Two days of qualification down, one to go.  Each game seems like a reprisal of the same themes - with so many champs in the League, there's no way to ban out a player, so you can only ban out the three champs that most annoy you, or the three champs that would ruin your secret strategem.  As a result, I see the same champs over and over: Olaf, Kha'Zix, Cho'Gath, Shen, Elise, Katarina top or jungle; Ezreal, Graves, Twitch, Miss Fortune, Sona, Lulu, bot duo; and Ryze, Ahri, Karthus, Vlad mid.  Any deviations are like a welcome breath of air for me, so it makes me wonder about the dudes who play just the one or two champs day in and day out.  Katarina is fun enough, but Olaf's game concept bores me.

Dirtnap Gaming vs Azure Gaming
---DNG bans: Twisted Fate, Malphite, Nunu---AZG bans: Jayce, Kha'Zix, Evelynn---
DNG: Shen, Cho'Gath, Ahri, Graves, Sona
AZG: Olaf, Nocturne, Ryze, Ezreal, Lulu
This game might be likened to a knock-down drag-out brawl.  It's close, and no quarter is given in the narrowly-won fights.  Eventually the scales tip in favor of DNG, via small things like 2-for-3 fights, and AZG not quite as in synch with Demonlul as DNG is with ecko.

Dirtnap Gaming vs Azure Gaming, Game 2
---DNG bans: Twisted Fate, Malphite, Nunu---AZG bans: Jayce, Shen, Kha'Zix---
DNG: Jax, Cho'Gath, Gragas, Graves, Sona
AZG: Olaf, Amumu, Evelynn, Ezreal, Lulu
AZG gets slightly ahead early in this one, and verrrrrrry slowly snowballs that advantage into a win. Commentators speculate that their trepidation may come from the game that they had won vs MRN on an earlier day that they eventually lost.

Dirtnap Gaming vs. Azure Gaming, Game 3

---DNG bans: Malphite, Nunu, Olaf---AZG bans: Jayce, Kha’Zix, Evelynn---

DNG: Shen, Lee Sin, Karthus, Ezreal, Taric

AZG: Cho’gath, Amumu, Twisted Fate, Miss Fortune, Lulu

This is another dragged out blow-for-blow fight.  It was dead even all the way to the end, the winner could not be predicted even 40 minutes in, and how often can you say that?  DNG just… won the stare-down at the end, I guess.

Meat Playground vs Team MRN, Game 1

---MP bans: Jarven, Riven, Anivia---MRN bans: Elise, Malphite, Evelynn---

MP: Cho’gath, Amumu, Kha’Zix, Kog’Maw, Nunu

MRN: Irelia, Shen, Katarina, Ezreal, Sona

Really it came down to team picks - Katarina couldn't get off her damage combo against Cho'gath, and Kog'Maw didn't have to get anywhere near the fight to be effective.  And, I believe I've said before, Meat Playground is a very end-game-heavy team. 

Meat Playground vs Team MRN, Game 2

---MP bans: Jarven, Riven, Anivia---MRN bans: Kha'Zix, Malphite, Evelynn---

MP: Cho’gath, Amumu, Katarina, Kog’Maw, Nunu

MRN: Olaf, Shen, Ahri, Urgot, Taric

Maybe MRN realized that part about late game strategy for MP.  They set up a mid-game team, and played lane farm with a compliant MP until nearly the twenty minute mark.  Even though they were down 6-1 in kills, they simply started pushing towers and winning team fights.

Meat Playground vs Team MRN, Game 3

---MP bans: Jarven, Riven, Anivia---MRN bans: Kha'Zix, Malphite, Evelynn---

MP: Shen, Cho’gath, Vlad, Vayne, Nunu

MRN: Olaf, Nocturne, Ahri, Urgot, Taric

Whew, the Cho'gath gets caught out at 45 seconds! And things start landsliding in MRN's favor, but it's an elimination game, so despite being way behind in kills, MP gives them a seriously hard time of it in every fight.  Team fights are almost constantly in effect, everyone is raring to fight at all times. 

Dirtnap Gaming vs Team MRN, Game 1

---DNG bans: Jarven, Malphite, Anivia---MRN bans: Kha'Zix, Jayce, Evelynn---

DNG: Shen, Lee Sin, Karthus, Ezreal, Lulu

MRN: Olaf, Nocturne, Ahri, Urgot, Taric

DNG was ruthless early on, invading to MRN's wraiths and killing ClakeyDeeee before he realized they were there, then killing him twice more before he was even level 6.  They abused Karthus/Shen to appear out of the jungle with tons of people and damage.  MRN figured out how to turn it around, and the repeated their mid-game-crush-team comp.

Dirtnap Gaming vs Team MRN, Game 2

---DNG bans: Urgot, Malphite, Anivia---MRN bans: Kha'Zix, Jayce, Evelynn---

DNG: Riven, Cho'gath, Kassadin, Graves, Lulu

MRN: Olaf, Jarvan, Ahri, Ezreal, Sona

If DNG had reviewed their notes on the weekend tournament like I did, they'd have known that Kassadin had a 0% win rate for the entire tournament, and would not have put their eggs in that basket in their elimination game. 

Results: 

Team MRN is the only survivor from the online qualifiers to join the other newly salaried professional players that will play every week.  The eight teams will be: 

CLG, TSM, Dignitas, Curse, The Brunch Club, Team MRN, Good Game University, Team Fear

Las Vegas March 2013, Day 2

Our hotel, the Westin, just off the strip, is not only smoke-free, but also offers 5 bucks at any of the in-house restaurants if you forego room service.  They claim it's for a more 'green' hotel.  Well, since they'll still give you the toiletries you need if you ask, the only thing room service does for me is make my bed, which I don't even care about.  All my stuff is plenty clean and put away, and they provide more than enough towels.  So, five bucks at their 24-hr Starbucks?  Sure.
In the morning we went to the Siegfried and Roy Secret Garden and Dolphin Habitat (long name).  Lucky thing, too, because we walked right in with no line at about 10am, and when we left, there was a massive ugly line outside in the rapidly building heat, and the dolphin area was really crowded with people.  In the morning, there was plenty of space around the dolphin pool to sit and watch at very close range.  They say that they don't train the dolphins to do tricks, but regular 'interacting' with the dolphins pretty much means tricks.  So we saw a dolphin show from as close as you can get without buying the Supreme Dolphin Experience (or whatever it's called).  Basically I was right behind the people who did buy that ticket.  Check it out:

The dolphin you can barely see on the far left is holding paintbrushes in its mouth and making abstract art.  You can buy them in the gift shop.  And we also saw some large cats.  Not that many, and unfortunately, they're all asleep during the day.  So, you make the determination on whether it's worth it - we bought the ticket 3-pack for this, the aquarium at Mandalay Bay, and CSI: The Experience.  You have to decide right when you buy the 3-pack, which three out of several tickets you want, and without a line to stand in, I had to make a split-second choice.  They're probably all a rip off, in the end.  Sigh, Vegas.
We meandered towards the Venetian, passing by the gondolas and Madam Tussard's.  I asked Nan if he wanted to check out a gondola ride, but it was really sunny and hot, the people in those gondolas looked like they were baking. He asked me if I wanted to check out Madam Tussard's, and that's a firm no.  Wax people are creepy, period the end.
When we got inside the shops at the Venetian, we were all but assaulted by a door greeter that dragged us to a time-share seller that made a very hard sell to get us to go to one of those presentations.  Even though she actually wanted money (a deposit to ensure we'd show up), the presentation seemed legit enough, so we agreed.  What else were we doing in the morning, anyway.  This whole vacation post is turning into an extreme couponing episode, isn't it?  Well, the money we save, we in turn blow on the blackjack tables.
We finished up exploring the Venetian - apparently there's two gondola rides, one inside and one outside - and went to Mandalay Bay to see the aquarium.  I didn't realize it until later, but there was a big boxing match going on in Mandalay Bay.  We must have missed the crowds lining up for it.  The aquarium is open pretty late, so we were confident there would be few people there, and there weren't many - apparently only the bad parents take their kids to an aquarium at 9pm at night.  These bad parents are also the ones who let their kids run around screaming at the top of their lungs.  So that was a little bit ruined. Also, strangely, the large tanks were significantly cloudy and poorly lit.  Otherwise, it was a nice setup - glass floor and ceiling panels, glass tunnel through the tank, gigantic sharks and rays, touch-tank rays, jellyfish, lionfish tank.
We ate in Citizen, the 24-hr restaurant in Mandalay Bay, and saw all the people from the fight leaving.  The music was turned up crazy loud in there, can't recommend it, despite free drink refills.  I wanted to play spot-the-hooch, but there's no where to sit or stand discreetly in Mandalay Bay, and their new nightclub isn't open. Nan came up with a new game, though: Bad Parent Watch, so we also vied to see who would spot the worst parents.  I scoured the casino floor, looking for someone smoking a cigarette, playing slots, and holding a baby, but no such luck.  We did see some parents buying their kids candy at 11:45pm, but no clear winner yet.
We played some late blackjack back at the Westin.  Usually I don't see the appeal of throwing money away, but I entertained myself by counting cards while Nan played.  It wasn't a busy table, so the dealer let me sit next to Nan and watch.  I told him I'd kick him or something to signal a favorable deal, but as it turned out, every time I was about to, the dealer would just so happen to win, so it would have just made him lose more money if I had anyway.  I was sufficiently entertained, though - contrary to popular opinion, it does not take any smarts to count cards, just an enormous amount of concentration.  Our first dealer dealt so fast that I probably couldn't have kept up if I had an abacus out.  Our last dealer dealt at a more sedate (rookie) pace. Nan thought I looked incredibly bored, just staring blankly at the cards and refusing all drinks and conversation.  At least I have something to keep myself occupied.  Hope the dealers in the future let me sit at the table.

Las Vegas March 2013, Day 1

The story behind this Las Vegas trip is that I finally decided to be a super-fan and buy tickets to IPL 6, after IPL 5 was so awesome and exciting.  And Vegas is a perfect place to go with Nan, since there's things for him to do that don't involve sitting in a big audience with a bunch of other LoL geeks.  I even convinced some of my other LoL crew to buy tickets, but I'm the only one who bought hotel and flight so far in advance.  And, just my luck, IPL folded up shop and died.  Not that I'm mad that I have to go to Vegas - there's other things to do there, but Goddammit, IPL.  I'm going to be mad at you forevermore.

We arrived very early on Friday, grabbed a rental car from the super-rental-car theme-park-style rental mega-hub, and went straight to the Hoover Dam.  It was sunny and approaching hot (especially for March), but not as hot as Vegas can get, thankfully.  Still, we had some drive-through McDonald's and had an extra water or two with ice from them.  We walked around and took many pictures, but didn't take a full tour, because Nan has been on one.  Did you know, though, that you can park for free on the far side of the dam?  It's not even really that far of a walk.  Don't pay the $7 to park fifteen feet closer!  The views were very nice from the dam and from the road.  We didn't climb up to Pat Tillman bridge - too sunny, no sunglasses or sunscreen, coming from a freezing cold climate.  We just soaked in some views and headed back.

As we half expected, it was still too early to check in, so we gave them our phone number and went to the Las Vegas Premium Outlets South.  I wanted to go early on purpose, before we went to the extremely expensive shops on the strip proper.  There were great outlet stores, not always huge deals, but we did manage to find some sweatshirts and coats on deep discount because it was so hot outside.  We checked into our hotel and took a lengthy siesta before cleaning up and going out in the late evening to the buffet at the Wynn, rated as one of the best on the strip.  Everything was quite good (decor was standard Las Vegas fare plus extremely tall flower vase structures) and dessert area was delectable, with crepes made to order and even ice cream cookie sandwiches made to order.

We spent some quality time hoochie-watching.  I tried to convince Nan to try and take pictures, but he thought it would be too obvious.  But it was really good - there are at least two night clubs in that complex, so the floor was full of ladies wearing their absolute minimum.  I definitely saw some undies underneath some too-short skirts, and we spent some time trying to spot the sketchiest hooch.  When Nan decided we were being too obvious, we went outside to watch the last Sirens of TI show.  We were incredibly disappointed, partly by the show, but mostly by the audience.  The show had the scantily-clad ladies as advertised, but that's not enough of a draw at that distance.  And you could really see how awesome the show must have been, back in it's heyday of actual pirate battle, since they kept a lot of the special effects, a few fancy dives, and sinking ships.  It must have been really fun.  It's not anymore, in case you were wondering.  The ladies sink the opposing ship due to mostly power of singing and burlesque dancing.  It's a mite ridiculous.  The other factor that was stupid was the audience.  I'll give a pass to the incrrrrredibly drunk ladies right behind me screaming obscenities and otherwise before, during, and after the show, because it's Vegas, and they give away a lot of drinks in big novelty cups.  But the numerous parents with small children in the audience?  Not so forgiving.  The show started after 11:30pm, first of all.  The other people on the strip at that hour are hookers or women dressed as hookers.  Even the ladies on the stage were dressed as hookers.  One child, no more than four or five, asked loudly what that siren "was doing to that pirate" right there on the stage in front of us.  I missed the parent's reply, but there's really nothing that could excuse them.  Heads up, parents, there's nothing for your kids on the strip.  If you thought Sirens of TI was for your kids, you were very, very wrong.  They don't want you there.  Just let your kids sleep.